BDE Moves
Sex Educator & Pleasure Coach

BDE Moves helps you shift your mindset from performance to pleasure.
We offer sex education & pleasure coaching to the general population.

Below are the three most common ways to work with Whitni!

10 Week Coaching

I offer two different 10wk programs. One for couples to help them with communication, navigating different desire styles, exploring kink, and generally finding the ways they complement one another to cultivate the sex they want. Another for individuals looking to do the same for themselves in a 1:1 setting. These sessions are all different depending on what the couples or individuals would like to explore. Book a free consult now to see this is the right fit for you!

Schedule a Consult


Attend a workshop when they are offered. Join BDE Moves – Whitni at one of her workshops: Shifting From Performance to Pleasure Based Sex, D/s Dynamic 101, Late Blooming Lesbian – Sex Ed, Navigating Responsive Desire, Self Pleasure. Attend live, ask questions, learn directly from her, & get empowered in your pleasure. She will answer questions, help you think deeply about your own experiences, & encourage you to shift your mindset. Want to simply watch it on your own? Easy, purchase access to a recording of the workshop to learn on your own time.

*The next Late Blooming Lesbian – Sex Ed workshop is scheduled for:

November 15th 7:30-10:00pm EST


To get an email next time one of her other workshops is offered complete the form linked below:

Get Notified


Want to explore on your own? Subscribe to Whitni’s Patreon or “Educational Accounting” options to access all the uncensored educational content Whitni offers, or purchase a “Spicy Accounting” subscription to access Whitni’s exclusive boudoir content. More info can be found here:

Subscriptions Info

About BDE Moves

Whitni Miller, CEO of BDE Moves, focuses on sex education & pleasure coaching specializing in queer sex & relational communication. She uses Instagram & TikTok to disseminate pleasure centered, sex education to the general population. Whitni is trauma-informed, kink-informed, & utilizes her yoga philosophy background to facilitate healing that empowers her clients to own their pleasure. Her goal is to expand our knowledge & understanding of intimacy, sex, arousal, desire, & all the in between. Ultimately creating a judgment free space for humans to feel safe being curious.

More About Whitni



This is a headshot image of Whitni looking over her left shoulder wearing a red dress with her hair curly & loose and her BDE Moves logo in the background.

Performance  Based

  • Penetration (w/a penis, fingers, or dildo) is the main event
  • Sex ends with ejaculation
  • Often includes rigid expectations of partners or own body
  • May feel like sex is following a script or routine
  • May feel anxious about not having an orgasm
  • May feel anxious about not satisfying a partner
  • May include tolerating pain or discomfort
  • Limited clear communication
  • Feeling “Stuck in your head”

*Source – Pleasure Centered Sexology

Pleasure  Based

  • Includes multiple activities
  • Agreement of what sex includes is decided in collaboration
  • Regular check-ins
  • Orgasm is a bonus not centra/ required
  • May include use of all body parts & accessories
  • Arousal allowed to come before desire
  • Does not require or expect anything from any persons body (eg bodily response, specific body type, ability or skill level)
  • Ends when any person wants it to end
  • May look different each time or include regular pleasurable activities
  • Focus on physical sensations